THE THEORY OF WHOLETONE GUBBLE

The Theory comprises a body of work spanning the course of several decades, with its origins generally attributed to Professor Lars McTuften and his research in the recording of what he referred to as ‘Chicken Dreams and Impulses’. Following Mr. McTuften?s arrest, he continued his research in Denmark.

The amount of basic tenets of the Theory is, as yet, unknown. Its central constructive helix being one of paradox and abstraction. With this in mind, one must proceed with a willful confusion and desire to be altered, or not, by the program. The program endeavors to elucidate with clarity and obscurity what the central work of Gubble is, and that is TO CREATE MORE GUBBLE. The reasoning behind this is missing.

Gubble theorists have nothing of substance to go on except maybe, perhaps, a desire to create more Gubble. This provides a refreshing freedom from the scientific method and ‘proving of facts’. There must be no laws other than those which present themselves momentarily, or else do not, or present themselves in a manner which can only be viewed in records of the event or situation. In this matter a Gubble Theorist creates a reflection of a world, or deviation from it, or something else entirely, or nothing.

All experiments are successes because a Gubble Theorist has no guidelines and wants to succeed, or fail, or arrive at some happy or sad or indifferent admixture. The point of all this is to find the point of all this or to arrive three quarters or seventeen sixteenths of the way to the point * * *

The Theory of Wholetone Gubble can be applied to music recordings. This can be said with relative certainty. The music is just music and none the less and none the more wiser. The Flying Nun. The Singing Nun. The Singing Farmer. The Yodeling Brakeman. The Nonsense Brakeman.

Essentially, Wholetone Gubble is saying what is said by all living organisms: “WE ARE HERE, WE HAVE ENERGY, AND WE ARE DOING STUFF”.

Regardless of the point. Gubble rejects its own point, and yet is ready to defend that point with militancy, finesse, and fanaticism. It is Dr. Frank Beam who put it best when he said:

“Good evening, Ladies and Gentlemen.”

What has motivated all of this lies at the heart of the mystery, or somewhere around the edges. For it could very well be your next door neighbor, practicing Wholetone Gubble, who manipulates an environment in a specific manner and professes to have a motive.

R. Hawkman
Schenectady